Midwest Odds: St. Louis Edition

Did I travel to St. Louis for a reset? Did I travel to St. Louis to go back in time - to a simpler time, to walks around campus, to drunken escapades, to chips for breakfast-lunch-dinner, to sleeping in until 3:00PM, to walking into lecture halls late (or not at all), to childish endeavers, to the defining moments of college life (at least, my college life) - the containerized chaos of it all?

Whatever the reason, the number of oddities I encountered during my trip to St. Louis stood out to me. Was it this weird back in college? Maybe being isolated in the university bubble distracted me from the weird. Not that the weird dampered my trip - I’d say it enhanced it, because I have more to write about. I arrived Friday afternoon and spent the whole day hanging out with Grace and Kobe. We got lunch together at City Park Grill in Tower Grove. Being a fry connoisseur, I got an order of fries (which they doubled just for me). I’d rate them a 7.5/10. Good size and shape, good amount of salt, and fresh tasting, but I had to dig to get the nice crispy fries that taste the best.

After City Park Grill I saw what I will call Oddity 1: Naked Man by the Pillar. Grace had parked her car on the street. Down the road I saw a building with white pillars in front, and a man posing, completely naked, as if he were a renaissance statue. Is it art or is mental illness? Well, all great artists are/were mentally ill, so perhaps both.

Anyway, we went to Found Vintage in South Grand. I’ve been to Found before, I don’t remember visiting this location but definetly the one on the Delmar Loop and the larger Found by the Pound in Berkeley. While I was shopping, Erin, my suitemate from freshman year texted me “Are you in St. Louis?” out of the blue. My head snapped left and right - was she behind me? Was she in the walls? I didn’t ask but just responded “yeah!” and we made a plan to meet later that night.

Found had colorful clothes with lots of patterns that were moderatly overpriced, but, as it usually goes, I found a dress I liked, gray with roses (two things I love…) and bought it. I didn’t like that nobody said hello when we walked in and the cashier was weirdly silent when I checked out. He wasn’t Gen Z, but he did that “Gen Z stare” people talk about. I suppose that was one of the oddities I encountered, but not too odd.

Later we visited Circa Now! records. The store felt like a time capsule. They were playing this band called Meat Puppies and had a CRT TV playing a music video. I’d like one of those for my room, I could put it in the corner and play weird videos and make it look artsy. Or maybe just have static playing - hypnosis? The man at the front said nothing as we browsed through boxes of records. There were lots of vinyls, video tapes, CDs, and the like, but I wasn’t in the mood for spending more money, although Kobe got a record for herself.

After visiting the record store we made a quick stop at the Delmar Loop for a nostalgia walk. Here I encountered Oddity 2: Young Boy on Bicycle. We were walking past the WashU apartments on the loop. A little boy on a bike zoomed past, screaming in a gremlin-like voice: “I’m gonna hit you!” The kids are alright! We also stopped by Vintage Vinyls, where I saw many Hum CDs. What’s the plural of Hum - Hummmmm?

Later we went to Up-Down Arcade Bar, which Kobe has been hyping up for a while, specifically for their Friday special. I couldn’t remember if I been there before but when I walked in I realized I had (like 4 years ago?), but I never had the Friday special, a huge slice of pizza for $2. I was happy! Although I would rate the pizza a 6.5 - which Kobe did not like. It wasn’t bad, but it’s not exceptional. Like for $2, it’s great, but for the regular price of $5 - I would pass. Am I hating??? We bought some tokens and went downstairs where we played Dance Dance Revolution. Even on easy mode it was so much faster than I expected, and more jumping than dancing. I performed terribly and sulked as the avatar on the screen berated me. Then it was Kobe’s turn, and she did much better. Out the corner of my eye I saw a guy that I almost thought was cute, and I questioned if I had a type. It’s all in the hair… anyway, he had a girlfriend which turned me Sahara Desert pretty fast. We went back upstairs with only one token left. I put it in a Dragon Ball Z game, thinking it’d be quick match, but I ended up spending 30+ mins fighting the same 3 guys over and over, switching between playing as Gohan and Future Trunks (my favorites). You know, there was a time I wanted the game Dragon Ball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi 3. It’s 20 year old game, and yet it’s going for $60+ on eBay. Isn’t that a scam? $60 = hours and hours of arcade Dragon Ball at Up-Down… seems like a better deal, I dunno…

For our final activity of the day we met up with Erin and Caroline at ‘ssippi wine bar. One thing I can say: I understand ‘ssippi is short for Mississippi but - and I could be misremembering - I didn’t see any references to Mississippi, not even a flag. Erin and Caroline brought a lot of their friends, who all seemed vaguely familiar (but I hadn’t actually met them before), and many expressed desires to move to Chicago. It seems Chicago is the next step up for born-and-bred St. Louisians who outgrow their occasionally odd city. Everyone seemed nice but it was that time of evening when I start to zone out from exhaustion. I did get some camcorder footage, which will be interesting to watch in 10 years. Another thing I can say: ‘ssippi was quirkly, liberal, and distinctly STL. More diverse than the few bars I have visited in Phoenix. Kobe, Grace, and I debated hitting up a dance party after leaving ‘ssippi, but we decided against it and headed home.

The second and final day of my trip was also packed. This was when I encountered oddities 3 and 4. Oddity 3: The shitting turtle. Grace and I were walking through Forest Park. Near a tree we saw a turtle sitting in what appeared to be a pile of mud. Then I saw it slowly stretch and strain it’s body until mushy excrement pushed out, a lot of it. According to Google, turtle poop should be solid not mushy, so this turtle was likely experiencing diarrhea, perhaps due to a lack of fiber or a parasite. I felt bad, but there was not much I could do. I hope it was able to sort itself out. As we were walking away, I heard a man tell his girlfriend, “Baby, that’s mud.” I have bad news for them…

Kobe met us at the art museum, where we encountered Oddity 4: Questionable Thirsty Man. The art museum itself was great, lots of art, free, and I like the African Art section. The only issue was this man, who at first raced passed us, shouting “beautiful women everywhere…”. I assumed he was on the phone. He came back around and asked us if we were over 18. Without thinking, I said no and he shrugged and left. Nothing wrong with shooting your shot, but if the first thing you have to ask is “Are you 18?,” you might be shooting at the wrong person…

We stopped by the African Arts Festival, which had a lot of vendors and good food. I got some fries from a booth (I’m not sure what was supposed to be African about the fries?), and when I sat down to eat them, I realized they tasted just like the fries at WashU my freshman and sophomore year, before they changed the recipe. For a moment, I was, where was I again? Confused freshman riding the Amtrak train, walking around campus with a big map… for a moment it was just another weekend in school, and there were no responsibilities besides homework and Friday night pre-games. Oh, the rush of it all, where many firsts happened. And as I finished the fries, the flashback ended. No, there would never be a return to those days. I do and don’t miss it.

When I went back on the Amtrak train to go home, I wondered when I would be in St. Louis again. Already it seemed so unfamiliar, with the changes on the loop and the unnatural strangeness. And Grace and Kobe, being the overachievers they are, will soon be moving. I can’t say I’m sure when I’ll visit again, but I think that’s fine. I’m not one for nostalgia anyway.