hello, maintenance? this is erika's husband. can you please clean up the carcasses of the deceased moths from the hallways? it's a blight.

Mopped the floor today, it was long overdue. I hate it when things get too dirty, but I still let it happen. In this instance it wasn’t entirely my fault. We were out of mop pads so there was not much to do regarding the situation. One thing I must note is that everytime I visit home (as in my parent’s home), I always end up cleaning like a crazy person - the bathrooms, the floors, everything. My brothers live at home but they don’t clean! What is it with men and neglecting cleanliness? There is nothing scarier than going to man’s apartment for the first time, because they have no sense of clean, so there’s always just a bit of inexplicable grossness that you’re sure to encounter. My one example of this: cat piss couch. I will not elaborate.

I loaded the dishwasher and got the mail. Ah, the comfort of routines on a simple day.

I was supposed to go for a walk but I took an impromptu nap. Then I took 30 minutes to convince myself to get up and go outside. The apartment hallway was littered with the bodies of dead bugs. Just a few days ago they were alive, jumping around trying fruitlessly to escape through the windows, nearing jumping on me (ew, gross), and now they are there, wings detached, disintegrating, but still a nuisance. I have to step over them to get to my car. Is this what I pay rent for?

I drove to T☐rget for an order pickup. I don’t support T☐rget, especially since they reversed their DEI initiatives (losers). But they had this drink I wanted to try, and Goodles noodles. Oh, Goodles is owned by Gal Gadot, who also has questionable views on genocide… but I like Goodles. Sometimes my resolve is not strong enough, I don’t stand up for what’s right. I mean it’s just mac and cheese do I really need to buy that brand of mac and cheese and yet I leave T☐rget with my bag of mac and cheese. And yet I will still judge those who don’t live to my moral standards. I’m something of a hypocrite. Or just human.

I heard a song on the way back to my car that I Shazamed, it’s called Hurricane by Cannons, would maybe be fun to learn on bass? Kind of funky. The drink I bought, it’s called LMNT, and I tried it once I reached home. I have to say, it’s truly awful and it tastes like salty battery acid. What an absolute waste.

I practiced the song I heard. I’m trying to be a better bassist so I didn’t look up the tabs. I figured out the first 40 seconds, but I kept messing up. Got frustrated. It was getting late. Booooo

Had a looksies in the mirror. I had lunch with Maya today. One thing we talked about (I wrote it down): the discrepancy between how you are perceived and how the world perceives you can be disorienting. Very dizzying. Like the dizzy I feel when A. Looking in the mirror vs B. Taking a picture. The camera distorts, how annoying. I’m still stuck on how I was perceived in like, the 3rd grade. Which was almost 20 years ago. Erika, you have to get over that someday. Erika, you must embrace Big Girl Erika. Ola was at lunch too. She said my blog was creative, that I am a creative person. Is that the impression I give? But if I’m not good at these things, how can I claim it? No, I’m being too hard on myself. I will claim creativity. I went to bed early yesterday and got up at 5am and claimed superiority but today I’m going to bed late. Too busy being creative.